Auld Alliance FC
Age: 24 Born: Basra Occupation: Republican terrorist Position: Winger Also known as the Phantom Winger, Neil has also been compared to Harry Houdini, in that he has the ability to magically disappear for entire games. Known for his fixing his fringe before taking a touch, he has mastered the cultured toe punt.
Age: 24 Born: Fulham Occupation: Child Actor Position: MOTM A first touch tighter than a snare drum, the Tree is known for his composure and penchant for halfway line own goals (once is more than enough…)
Age: don’t worry about it Born: DDR Occupation: Pintman (we reckon he’s Stasi) Position: Striker Suaver than a cashmere turtleneck, Deutscher Rob has brought continental flair and grace to our well-oiled machine. N.B., reader: if you have any unwanted cable knit turtlenecks lying about your place, he’ll surely take them off your hands.
Age: 166 Born: ITALIA Occupation: Pasta maker Position: Pro-Italy Antonio is Italian. Did he mention that?
Age: 23 Born: The Shire Occupation: Journeyman Position: CB/CDM/CM/CAM/CF/ ST/’The Hole’ Lethargy incarnate WILARDDDDDDDD still shores up any leaks in the AA’ outfit with his size 13 Hi-Tech boots. A true Auld Alliance stalwart, he’s as reliable as he is slow (seriously an articulated lorry on rue François Miron has a tighter turning circle than George).
Age: <40 (knee age: 87) Born: Salopia Occupation: Posting garbage on Facebook Position: Physio’s chair His playing days may now be behind him, yet Alister remains a key cog in the AA machine. A nippy striker in his pomp, Ali has brought that vim and vigour to his Dropbox administration and his occasional John Sitton-esque touchline tantrums.
Age: ? Born: Landaan Occupation: Insurance salesman Position: CB A 21st century player in an old skool team (and by that we mean he has a shit haircut and tattoos). An uncompromising, no-nonsense defender, exactly what a defence full of silky ball players needs.
Age: 26 Born: The Home Counties Occupation: Livestock vendor Position: CB/LB A new arrival for the 17/18 UFOLEP season who has ‘tongue punched’ his way into the first XI. Never ask him what ‘tongue punching is’…
Age: 14 Born: Burnley Occupation: Northern minstrel Position: CM AA’s own Giovincom the Lancashire Terrier has added guile and craft to the midfield.
Age: 113 Born: S’Afrika Occupation: Pug owner Position: Winger A springbok on the wing, bru. They may have lost the Boer War in 1902 but nobody told this warrior as he scraps and fights for every ball. We still have no idea why he has a welsh name…
Age: 241 Born: The Land of the Free Occupation: Hacker Position: GK Perhaps the only yank in the world to speak at less than 200 dB, Eric has filled the gaping hole that has plagued the Auld Alliance for years with his cattish reflexes and assured handling.
Age: 241 Born: The Home of the Brave Occupation: Wheeler and dealer Position: LB The US army corps’ loss was the Auld Alliance’s gain when Mike decided to uproot from Seattle and come to Paris. He loves a concert as much as he does a crunching tackle and we wouldn’t have him any other way.
Age: 24 Born: Straight outta Winchester Occupation: Bank clerk Position: Very middleclass An imposing CB, when he pairs with Jake Annett at the back they’re as likely to concede a calamitous goal as to plot the domination of well over an 1/8 of the known world. Devas played once for the team on his year abroad and the fond memories where enough to drag him back to Paris years later to once again don the famous purple shirt.
Age: 27 Born: Lewisham Occupation: Market trader Position: Wherever he felt like putting himself (should have been CB but was more often than not ST)The thinking man’s Danny Dyer left a huge hole in the team when he moved back to the motherland to take up terrace hooliganism fulltime at The Den. Hated, loved and feared by all in equal measure, he will forever be seen as the beating heart and founding father of the team.
Age: “Have you got any ID, pet?” Born: Stockport Occupation: Pretend manc/Oasis tribute act Position: CB/’The Roy Keane role’ It was once said “there is one thing to know about our team. You have The Marshall, The Architect and The (can’t remember this name)… and I’m all three of them!” Whilst this is undeniably true, it also shows just how much of a donkey this guy is. If Cam spent as much time practising his tackling as he does trying to convince people that he is actually from Manchester then maybe our goal difference would read less like Derby County (where he currently lives btw) in the 2007/08 Premier League season. The heir apparent to Charlie Moore hasn’t done as catastrophically bad a job as the author had thought he would when inheriting team leadership.
Age: 39 Born: Valencia Occupation: Orange seller Position: LBThe Marathon Man can be seen endlessly galloping up and down the AA’s left flank, as keen to deliver a cross as he is clatter an opposing winger, our resident Spaniard just bloody loves the game.
Age: 25 Born: Hackney (apparently) / He’s actually from Ludlow Occupation: Football business watcher Position: CM The engine of the team, Nelson will never stop running (especially when he feels aggrieved and sees someone’s legs to kick just in front of him). An AA stalwart entering his 5th season with the team, he’s improved as a player year on year. The team’s only teetotaller but don’t let that put you off him, he’s horrendous personality will do that on its own.
Age: 20 Born: Oxfordshire Occupation: Milky Bar kid impersonator Position: CM/RB Joint captain of the team with fellow ULIP student, Jack Adamson, perennial MOTM winner Luke is famed in the UFOLEP league for his endless running and hounding of the opposition. It is whispered in the vestiaires that he regularly competed in triathlons before moving to Paris to eat cheesy wotsits and attend the odd lecture at university.
Age: 20 Born: West London Occupation: Tracksuit wearer Position: ST The other half of the AA’s deadly ULIP duo, Jack has been terrorising defences in the league for two seasons now and is well on his way to surpassing Charlie Moore and team legend, Josh Pickering as the all-time leading goal scorer. Will he reach that tally of 7 goals??? Only time will tell…
L'historique de l'équipe
En 2009, FC ULIP a rejoint le Tankard's League de Paris. ULIP (University of London Institut in Paris) est une faculté anglaise qui se situe sur l'esplanade des Invalides et vu le faible nombre d'étudiants ils ont dû trouver un bar sponsor ainsi que de nouveaux joueurs afin de disputer dans une ligue de foot. Le Tankard's League, fondé en 2002/3 était une ligue des bars avec jusqu'à 10 équipes qui disputaient un championnat et une coupe chaque saison. FC ULIP est passé par plusieurs sponsors avant de retrouver l'Auld Alliance - 5th Bar, Rush Bar, Pizza Wawa et le Coq & Bulldog. L'Auld Alliance était en fait une des équipes originales de cette ligue, et via notre équipe il a retrouvé sa place parmi les footballeurs de bars à Paris.
Charlie Moore est le vétéran de l’équipe ayant joué 7 saisons comme capitaine, lui comme plusieurs d’autres joueurs a étudié, ou étudie à ULIP, l’équipe compte également les étudiants en année Erasmus, des amis retrouvés autour des bières, et des gens trouvés perdues dans la rue. La base de l’équipe est anglaise mais on a des français et un espagnol qui rajoutent le « continental touch ».
La saison du Auld Alliance Football Club 2017-2018
Programme des rencontres:
lundi 5: Ladoumègue, AULD_ALLIANCE MOKETA
vendredi 9: Puteaux, BOMBARDIER AULD_ALLIANCE
lundi 5: Lenglen, TENNESSEE AULD_ALLIANCE
vendredi 9: Parachute, AULD_ALLIANCE PANAME_UNITED
lundi 19: Lenglen, VASCO_DE_GAMINS AULD_ALLIANCE
lundi 2: Ladoumègue, AULD_ALLIANCE BLAMS
lundi 9: Fillette, ASE19 AULD_ALLIANCE
lundi 16: Fillette, AULD_ALLIANCE FCP7
lundi 23: Fillette, GUNNAR AULD_ALLIANCE
lundi 30: Lenglen, AULD_ALLIANCE SPECTRES
lundi 14: Fillette, ARMB AULD_ALLIANCE
lundi 28: Choisy, AULD_ALLIANCE FC_PALAIS
lundi 11: Choisy, AULD_ALLIANCE CORCORANS
Un point de vue social
Même si on a des maillots violets assez professionnels et deux ou trois joueurs qui rêvent toujours de jouer dans la coupe de monde, la réalité c'est que le 3e mi-temps est aussi, sinon plus important que les deux premiers. On se retrouve régulièrement dans le bar pour les matchs du Premier League, Ligue de Champions, matchs internationaux et les 6 Nations.